“Twisting turning trying to fit in
As if I was not one to fit
Going against the grain?
Believing the illusion of my roundness and their square
Keeping separate holding back hiding away
Won’t the veil ever be lifted?
Won’t the cloud go away?
When will the truth be revealed?
When will I feel okay?
The answer, I believe, is so simple
And in its ease I lose trust
‘cause nothing in life is easy or to the point
or that is what I have thought
perceiving only one side of things
perpetuating the deceit told long ago
like a slave, I whip myself and punish
painstakingly I will hold up the lie
and die cowardly and squirmish
and it feels so good like a lullaby
to think of my brutal destruction
at the hands that script these words
I will lay this body down and throttle it
Until the last precious breath is gone
And maybe then the pain will end.” – Megan M. Seaman